Match Report: Turks Head – Whitworth Valley (W E Kay Trophy)

May 6, 2007

Goodwin Reporting….
First, a [crap] poem from my memory:

“No-one can tell me, nobody knows,
where the wind comes from, where the wind blows.
But if I stop holding the strings of my kite,
it would blow with the wind for a day and a night.
And then when I found it wherever it blew,
I would know that the wind had been going there too.
So then I can tell them where the wind blows,
but where the wind comes from, nobody know”

Under some very blustery conditions the Turks eventually cruised to a 4-2 victory against Whitworth Valley. The chaps on the touchline were on top form with the banter to make up for the absence of the Dale FC bunch.

Dolly P kept us all fed. Andy Nuttall had TWO butties so it was no surprise that he was desparate to go home for a poo by half time. MJ treated himself to a butty before the game.

OK I don’t do conventional match reports so here are some highlights that I remember:

Stunning goal by Easty, airshot by Easty, Woody hobbled off, Sparky scored a poacher’s goal, Ref had a dodgy tash, AJ booked for dissent, Sedge pulling some good saves out, Lyons didn’t start any fights, Manion blocked a goal-bound effort by Si, Sparky scored a penny, their 2nd goal was very nice, AJ getting called “Shaggy” by opposite team, Their right-back getting kicked in the face twice in 2 minutes and having a family potrait booked for this afternoon, Hardesty falling over whilst fagging a ball, very entertaining game on the next pitch, good news about a possible playoff scenario.

Team: Seymour, M. Jones, Mannion, A. Jones, Hall, Lyons, Wood, Almond (Lang-Whiston), Orchard (Ormrod), Eastwood, Perks (Emmott).

Subs: Hulme, Curran

Goals: Eastwood, Orchard, Perks (2)


Match Report: Turks Head – Copperpot Res. (League)

May 1, 2007

Despite goals from Sparky and Lamby, Copperpot Res. managed to edge a tight game that I think even the most passionate fan would be able to describe as a football match.

Credit to Copperpot for grinding out the win, and credit to our lads too for a decent effort.

Still plenty to play for this season though, with the quarter final of the W E Kay Trophy coming up this Sunday, and then three more league games which could still see us clinch promotion if we manage to improve our goal difference by twenty. Bearing in mind we beat Whitworth Valley 8-1, having been 1-0 down at half-time, I think we all know we’re more than capable of doing this.

Team: Seymour, M. Jones, Mannion, A. Jones, Hall, Wood, Almond, Nuttall, Lyons, Eastwood, Perks

Subs: Day, Hardisty, Emmott, Parker, Lang-Whiston

Goals: Perks, Almond

At the request of the league, please do not comment on anything that happened off the pitch. Just talk about the football. An enquiry is likely so we are being asked to let that issue be resolved through the proper channels.


Match Report: Bamford H&H – Turks Head (Rochdale Online League Cup)

April 30, 2007

Well the winning streak had to end sooner or later, and being beaten by the odd goal in three by a Premier Division side to go out of the cup at the quarter final stage is not exactly the worst way for the run to end.

The first half was tight and, although we hit the post early on, there weren’t really many clear-cut chances for either side. Although it’s worth pointing out that MC pulled off a cracking, if unorthodox, save at the end of the half that has probably left him with very sore knackers this morning.

Bamford took the lead early on in the second half with a good finish from a tight angle, only for Lyonsy to equalise with a great strike into the top corner almost straight from the kick-off. But another good finish from their nippy centre forward put them back in front, and this time it was enough for them to hold on to, despite a bit of late pressure from Turks that really only led to a couple of long range efforts.

Definitely not one of out better performances of recent weeks, things just never seemed to get going, due mainly to the opposition getting about us quickly when we had the ball and then doing a good job of holding onto the ball when they had possession. The good thing is I think we all learned something from this defeat, more so than any other time we’ve lost this season.

Team: Curran, M. Jones, Mannion, A. Jones, Hall, Lyons, Nuttall, Almond, Orchard, Wood, Perks (Lang-Whiston)

Subs: Emmott, Hardisty

Goals: Lyons


Match Report: Wardleworth – Turks Head (League)

April 24, 2007

Another great win and a quality, battling performance to beat Wardleworth, who we now leapfrog into 3rd position.

Our 9th consecutive win (EASILY a Turks Head record, according to Mr. Chairman) has put us in with a great chance of overtaking FC Dale and getting promoted as runners-up. In fact, we can even afford to draw a match and still finish above them. If we lose one, and win the remaining three, we will finish level on points – but I’m not sure if it goes to goal difference or a play-off at that point. Regardless, we are definitely aiming to win all our remaining fixtures now!

Back to the game though. A decent performance from the defence to secure yet another clean sheet, and hard work and good forward play by the front men.

But special mention must surely go to the midfield who showed excellent commitment and workrate – led by an absolutely colossal Nutgreaves -especially in the face of some brutal tackling (fouling) that led to a booking, a straight red and what would have easily been another straight red had only the ref seen it.

We definitely, and perhaps understandbly, started out a bit nervous and Wardleworth were playing some good stuff early on, but after we settled we always looked the more dangerous side and were never really in threat of conceding. But it still took an absolute corker of an effort from Si to break the deadlock and it remained tight until Easty curled a free kick that the ref decided crossed the line before the keeper scooped it out of the net. Just to make sure, Sparky scraped the rebound in anyway.

I know Gooders has video clips of the two goals, so hopefully they’ll get posted on here shortly. 

Time to turn our attention to the quarter finals of the Rochdale Online League Cup, where we meet Premier Division side Bamford this weekend.

Team: Seymour, Hall (Mannion), M. Jones, A. Jones, Orchard, Wood, Almond, Nuttall, Lyons, Perks, Eastwood

Subs: Curran, Hardisty, Emmott, Day

Goals: Orchard, Eastwood


Match Report: Turks Head – Whitworth Valley (Rochdale Online League Cup)

April 23, 2007

The end of season fixture congestion doesn’t look set to be alleviated any time soon as our eighth consecutive win has put us through to the quarter finals of the Rochdale Online League Cup.

After a couple of weeks without a game, we seemed to spend most of the first half dusting off a few cobwebs, but we definitely improved after falling behind and I don’t think anybody thought we deserved to be 1-0 down at half-time.

Eastwood (who successfully shook off his ‘air shot’ tag this week) might have had a hat-trick in the first half but for some woeful finishing, but the award for worst performance of the half surely goes to their linesman, who seemed to flag just about every time we got the ball in their half. Kudos to the ref for having a word with him and having the sense to ignore most of his outrageous flagging. In fact, credit to the ref for having a tremendous game full-stop, I reckon that might just have been the best refereeing performance we’ve had this season.

Much better second half all-round though. Easty bagged the first Turks Head hat-trick of the season, though Woody wasn’t far behind him in scoring three (although other reports say he only got two and a half), and Ste Ormrod finally proved that he can score with his feet – just as long as he’s 40 yards out and the keeper is nowhere to be found!

Coming back from 1-0 down to 7-1 up was a pretty remarkable achievement, but I don’t think anybody thought that the game was dead and buried at that point. Indeed, if it wasn’t for Seymour’s lengthy pins performing heroics to keep out a late penalty, Whitworth could have been right back in it. Although I think the lad who took the penalty made it easy on Seymour by deciding to spot the ball in a three-inch deep ditch. Genius!

Fortunately, we managed to grab an all-important eighth goal to really kill the match off and clinch a quarter-final berth against Premier Division Bamford H&H.

I think that just about covers everything….

Team: Seymour, M. Jones, Orchard (Lyons), Mannion, A. Jones, Almond, Hall, Nuttall (Hulme), Wood, Eastwood, Perks (Ormrod) Subs: Hardisty, Emmott, Day.

Goals: Eastwood (3), Wood (3), Ormrod, M. Jones


Match Report: Royal Exchange – Turks Head

April 8, 2007

Well the gaffer might have been away but the story was the same. A brace from Sparky, a towering header by Nutty and a one yard thunderbolt from Lyonsy gave us our seventh consecutive win.

Unfortunately almost half our team are going to be digging into their pockets to pay fines after five bookings were picked up – four for ‘mouthing off’ at the ref, and one for a mis-timed tackle. In defence of the lads who saw yellow, when the ref told us that he wouldn’t stand for any “effing and jeffing” aimed at him before the match, he failed to tell us we weren’t allowed to talk to the opposition, or even to each other, without being booked. I can’t help but wonder what the league chairman, who was in attendance today, made of some of the decisions.

With Wardleworth not playing today, we took advantage of our game in hand to move up to third place in the league, three points behind FC Dale who notched up another win.

In other news, Bamford (bottom of the Prem) beat Birches (4th in the Prem) in the Rochdale Online Cup, which is worth noting because – if we beat Whitworth Valley in the same competition – we’ll now be playing Bamford.

Oh, and finally, special mention to Easty for making his first Turks’ appearance in about 6 months…and promptly breaking several air-shot records including most air-shots in a 20 minute appearance (five) and most air shots in a single move (two and a half). Good to have you back mate!


Match Report: Bay Horse – Turks Head

April 3, 2007

[click here to view/download the video of this game or click here to watch it on youtube. If you watch it, please comment below]

Through to the next round of the league shield.

Six wins on the run.

We didn’t play well but we won (isn’t that the supposed to be the mark of a decent side?).

And, as a defender, I’m well pleased that we’ve now kept three consecutive clean sheets. We had actually only kept one clean sheet in the entire of the season (14 previous games) up until these last three matches, and even that came against FC Bernard when they didn’t have a full side out.

In fact, we’ve only conceded 2 goals in our last 5 matches, which is quite an achievement in Sunday league football.

But what is screwing with my head is that we have only become this tight defensive unit ever since we changed to a more attacking formation, Well, whatever, kudos to the gaffer and his tactical wizardry!


FC Dale 0 – 3 Turks Head

April 1, 2007

Hilly, Lammie and Si all on target today
Another clean sheet.
All the ladies went crazy for lyons

click here to view or download the video.
click here to watch it on youtube


Weekend Update

March 11, 2007

Here is the photo gallery from the weekend:
http://picasaweb.google.com/turksheadfc/11Mar07VsNorthStar

Not our best performance of the season, but a good 3-1 win against The Star in windy conditions was a decent result and makes it two wins out of two for our new 4-3-3 formation.

FC Dale and Bay Horse both lost today, so we are definitely back in with a shout for 2nd place in the league, especially if we win the two MASSIVE games we have coming up – we play Wardleworth next Sunday, and Bay Horse the following week.

In other news, Sparky’s brace today has put him on 9 goals for the season and nudged him ahead of Si Orchard in the race for the Turks Head Golden Boot.

Mark J.


Turks Head 1-2 Bay Horse

February 26, 2007

To quote the [new] thinking man’s number 8:

“Some key players missing, a couple of inuries during the game, a red card for the captain, a penalty miss, a shot against the bar, a couple of dodgy refereeing decisions…it was an eventful game today.”